This article is the fourth in a series of interviews with people affected by the war in Ukraine who have found temporary shelter at the Caux Refuge.

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As the war in Ukraine has been raging for 3 months, Oksana Stelmakh, a nurse from Kharkiv, reflects on how the current situation has impacted her family, now scattered over three different countries. Since her arrival in Caux early April she and a friend have been staying at the Caux Refuge, slowly taking steps into a new future.

Oksana, you arrived at the Caux Refuge on 3 April 2022. Were did you go first when you realized it was necessary to leave Kharkiv?

Oksana: When we left Kharkiv at the beginning of March we went straight to Kremenchuk, approximately 250km from our hometown. That was on the second or third of March. At first we planned to go to Western Ukraine but finally stayed in Kremenchuk because it was quiet there. Friends helped us to find a very nice place to stay and the locals there were very kind to us. At that point we were still  sure that everything would be over soon and we would be able to come back to Kharkiv.

And then you realized that the situation escalated further?

Oksana: Yes, the situation only got worse after we left Kharkiv. During that period, Liuba called me. She is a friend and colleague of mine and we have known each other for many years. It was a rescue call, as it turned out later. Her daughter had worked with Initiatives of Change in the past and was trying to evacuate her mom to Caux. Liuba, considering her age, asked if I would be willing to accompany her.

But that meant separation from your son, daughter and son-in-law.

Oksana: Yes, it did. So I refused point-blank. I was hoping to be with my kids. If they stayed in Kharkiv - I would stay in Kharkiv. When we left we had five minutes to gather our belongings and I was ready to leave with them. But I mentioned Liuba’s proposal to my daughter and her husband that day.

And how did they react? Did they object?

Oksana: No, not at all, they actually said that I should definitely go and that they would be more at peace. Knowing I would be safe in Switzerland also meant they would have more space for manoeuvres and more mobility. It wasn’t an easy decision.

So at first you all decided to stay in Kremenchuk?

Oksana: Yes, at that time we were all still in Kremenchuk. We expected to stay there as long it would remain quiet there. We realized the situation could get worse but at least we could all jump straight into our cars and leave. There was quite a crowd of us, including my son-in-law’s parents and their two grandchildren as their daughter had already left Ukraine before the war and gone to France. So they planned to take the kids to their mom somehow.

So did they manage to evacuate together with their grandchildren?

Oksana: Yes, but in the end they went to Germany as their daughter had found a job there and speaks better German than French. She lives far from my daughter who is also in Germany now, but on the opposite side of the country. But at least they are in the same country.

Is it your first time in Caux? What were your first impressions of this place?

Oksana: I have never been to Caux before. It’s extraordinary. The beauty of this place is truly breathtaking. But I can’t help compare things to Ukraine, to our Crimea. I spent a lot of time there in my youth. It’s very beautiful and such comparisons always make me cry. (weeps)…I’m sorry.

Are you often in touch with your dear ones who stayed in Ukraine?

Oksana: Of course, we have a big family there. It’s the fourth or fifth generation who has been living in the same house since 1927. My grand-grandparents bought it and we still live there. That kind of inheritance is much more common in Western Ukraine or some villages. Our family is rare or maybe even unique in that regard in Kharkiv.

Are they all still in Kharkiv now?

Oksana: One of my cousins went to Poltava but she is already planning to come back to Kharkiv soon and another cousin never left Kharkiv. My 82-years old aunt also stayed. Of course, we are calling each other very often. Particularly with my son, he’s very much on his own in this situation so we chat even more often than we call each other.

Does your daughter plan to visit Caux?

Oksana: Yes, my daughter and her family visited me on the weekend before the Orthodox Easter for a couple of days. I was very happy to see them at last even though it was such a short visit. I will go and visit them in Germany as soon as they have an opportunity to host me. But I also realize that they have so many things to do and organize. They are starting everything from scratch in a new country. But my son can’t leave Ukraine for now so my biggest wish now is to see him!

And how does your daughter and her family feel in Germany?

Oksana: I have the impression it’s quite difficult. At first, my daughter was crying all the time, everything just felt bad, everything is so different from Ukraine. She just wanted to come back home. They attend intensive German classes every day. And dealing with German bureaucracy also takes time, of course.

For all of you the situation is completely new. How are you living through this?

Oksana: It is very difficult. My daughter told me that if she won’t be able to find a job in Germany she will try and go back home at the first opportunity. My job situation back home in Kharkiv is also very uncertain. I used to work as a nurse in a small clinic before the war broke out but I don’t know if there will be a job for me left when come back. Right now I send out appplications for jobs here in Switzerland. Our liaison coordinator Katia at the Caux Refuge is helping me with that, but it takes time. And language is crucial.

Have you already started French classes?

Oksana: I study with Eliane, our neighbour, with a group in Clarens and online. It’s intense. But I also realize that I can’t learn a new language in a month, not at my age. But I could look after ill people in clinics and at home as such care does not require advanced language skills. It’s all difficult but I still feel supported.

And what keeps your spirit high in such overwhelming times? You are still always so active, positive and smiling.

Oksana: I think that’s generally my character anyway. I wouldn’t say that I have had a difficult life and I am used to dealing with everything on my own. I divorced early and had to take care of our family during the huge 1990s crisis in Ukraine. And it’s good to always keep busy. That’s vital, otherwise you’ll most certainly get the blues.

And Liuba, with whom I travelled to Caux, is such a kind person. Friendship is integral when it comes to living through harsh times. It would be much harder if I were here on my own. With Liuba, I can discuss everything and it’s also comfortable just staying silent with her. She’s very understanding and I wish everyone had such a friend.

In spite of everything, what gives you hope for the future?

Oksana: You know, everything is changing. Nothing is permanent. Nothing can last forever. The curve has gone down so drastically that it means at some point it should go upwards as drastically again! I’m absolutely convinced and have trust in this.

About the author

Anastasia Slyvinska is a journalist from Kyiv, Ukraine. She has worked as a TV host, a foreign reporter and a manager for media outlets in Ukraine and abroad. Having worked at both Ukrainian and Canadian Parliaments she combines her media expertise with her political sciences background, holding a MA in Political Science. Anastasia has been part of the IofC community since 2014 when she first participated at the conference Just Governance for Human Security. She is currently living in Lausanne, Switzerland.

 

YOU CAN HELP!

 

As our own sources of funding are running out, we need your help to support the Caux Refuge project financially. We need CHF 20,000 to ensure that the group can be hosted until the end of 2022. We will use these funds to finance food aid and other costs related to the group's stay at the Villa Maria in Caux.

We thank you for your support. Please pledge your support here and specify “Caux Refuge” when making your contribution. If you have any proposals and questions, please get in touch with us.

 

 

Please note that the opinions expressed in these articles are those of the interviewees and not do not necessarily reflect the opinion of the interviewer and Initiatives of Change Switzerland.

This article is the third in a series of interviews with people affected by the war in Ukraine who have found temporary shelter at the Caux Refuge.

Before the war in Ukraine broke out, Nadia Donos enjoyed her dream job as a Ukrainian language and literature teacher. Throughout her career she has successfully implemented numerous projects in the education sector.

Even after almost two decades of teaching she continues to educate herself, committed to the life-long learning process of each individual. A graduate of Kyiv-Mohyla Business School and the School of Educational Managers programme, she is co-initiator of a leadership course for children and adolescents, has edited teachers' manuals for the Leader in Me programme and conducted trainings and workshops in her home town Poltava in Central Ukraine.

As a child, Nadia couldn’t imagine herself becoming anything else but a school teacher. That dream and her peaceful family life in Poltava were suddenly disrupted by the Russian invasion when she had to flee Ukraine with her 17-year-old daughter while her husband stayed behind.

Now based at the Caux Refuge, Nadia continues to teach children in Ukraine full-time online and will start working as a volunteer teacher for Ukrainian refugee children in Geneva.

Nadia, under what circumstances did you and your daughter decide to leave your hometown?

Nadia: My daughter and I left Poltava in early March. We realized it had become too dangerous to stay. There were constant air alarms and almost no opportunity to teach and study normally. We spent each night in the basement of the school because it was too scary to stay in the high-rise building where we lived. So in the end we decided to leave… First, we went to Poland and then to Caux in Switzerland.

And how did you get to Caux? Did you already know anybody here?

Nadia: My husband Leonid is an active member of the Initiatives of Change network. He has been to conferences in Caux several times (2017 - 2019) and knows a lot of people here. It is thanks to Initiatives of Change and these friends that my daughter Sophia and I are now here, Of course we are very thankful for all the help and coordination that Initiatives of Change has been providing. Without this, it would be very hard for us.

Do you continue to work online?

Nadia: Yes, I still work full-time, teaching online classes to children in Ukraine.

What is the biggest motivation for you as a teacher during times of war?

Nadia: It’s challenging. The children are going through very difficult moments. But those children, their dreams and prospects are my biggest motivation. Now each Ukrainian faces his or her own personal frontline and has to figure out what he or she can do best. As they learn, our children and teachers are waging an important battle for the future of the country. And this future will not be taken away from us by anyone, even by the Russian army. I am convinced that Ukraine and our children have a great future and the whole world will hear about it! So we will not stop! 

Does your daughter Sophia continue her studies online with her teachers back in Poltava? Or is she looking for a place to study here in Switzerland?

Nadia: Sophia is currently studying online with Ukrainian teachers but will start school in Lausanne in about a week. She likes Caux and its picturesque surroundings very much. I only wish it hadn't been under such terrible conditions that she had a chance to come to this beautiful place…

Do you speak about the war with your students and your own daughter?

Nadia: I do not avoid talking about the war with children at all. We discuss the current situation and their experiences. In my opinion, we, as teachers, have the possibility to reduce the tensions and feelings of anxiety, establish trust with our students and empower them. This is very important in such challenging times.

It seems teaching is your calling. Have you always wanted to be a teacher?

Nadia: Teacher… This word has always been associated with my childhood dream. I never imagined myself taking another path in life. When I was little I used to pretend I was teacher, putting on my mother’s high heels, a shawl on my shoulders, carrying around notebooks and my dad's textbooks, which I snuck out of our old attic. All this was a part of my childhood dream. My "students" were my grandmother and her elderly friends who were frequent guests at our home. I preferred to teach them while my peers were playing with dolls. I remember my mother asking once what to bring back from the city. I replied: 'A red pen! And it has to be a beautiful one! I want to write beautifully in my students' notebooks because I am a teacher!'

So your dream has come true!

Nadia: Absolutely! Right from the beginning it was the obvious choise for me. And my dream has come true: I am a teacher! Despite the circumstances, I am proud of the fact that I can teach and continue learning. And now I’m more motivated than ever!

How do you motivate children to study under such difficult circumstances?

Nadia: While everyone was still discussing what environment would motivate children to learn - we have already created it through an online school called DONOschool. I came up with an idea to create such a space after studying at Kyiv-Mohyla Business School. Before the war DONOschool was an educational space in Poltava and since the war broke out, it's fully online. We are a team that create and implement new approaches to modern education and we support Ukraine's European integration and do everything to make education human-oriented.

What are the main objectives and tasks of your school?

Nadia: We prepare children for school and high school students for independent external evaluation tests to help them get admitted to university. We teach Ukrainian language, history and mathematics in groups of up to 6 students. Other than that we teach masterclasses in the development of children's leadership potential and organize consultations with qualified psychologists. Now, more than ever, such online classes, masterclasses and consultations bring help to children, strengthen their self-confidence and help them develop their potential to reach their dreams.

What are your plans for the future?

Nadia: As I have already said, we are all on the frontline, be it as a teacher or a doctor, a cook or an entrepreneur. Besides teaching online I plan to start working as a volunteer in Geneva next week. I am going to teach children in Ukrainian language and literature and I can’t wait to meet my new students!

About the author

Anastasia Slyvinska is a journalist from Kyiv, Ukraine. She has worked as a TV host, a foreign reporter and a manager for media outlets in Ukraine and abroad. Having worked at both Ukrainian and Canadian Parliaments she combines her media expertise with her political sciences background, holding a MA in Political Science. Anastasia has been part of the IofC community since 2014 when she first participated at the conference Just Governance for Human Security. She is currently living in Lausanne, Switzerland.

 

YOU CAN HELP!

 

As our own sources of funding are running out, we need your help to support the Caux Refuge project financially. We need CHF 20,000 to ensure that the group can be hosted until the end of 2022. We will use these funds to finance food aid and other costs related to the group's stay at the Villa Maria in Caux.

We thank you for your support. Please pledge your support here and specify “Caux Refuge” when making your contribution. If you have any proposals and questions, please get in touch with us.

 

 

Please note that the opinions expressed in these articles are those of the interviewees and not do not necessarily reflect the opinion of the interviewer and Initiatives of Change Switzerland.

Photo top: Véronique Sikora

This article is the second in a series of interviews with people affected by the war in Ukraine who have found temporary shelter at the Caux Refuge.

For more than a week Anatolii, Tetiana, and their three sons lived without electricity, heating or water in freezing temperatures in the village of Horenka near Kyiv. After a long journey through Ukraine and the EU they have now found peace in Caux.

Now the boys are enrolled in a local school. They are playing and laughing once again and Anatolii and Tetiana say they can’t wish for more.

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How did the war in Ukraine start for your family?

Anatoli: Everything started in the first minutes of day one, at 4am on 24 February. Helicopters came. Some people said there were around 30 of them. By 9 am three of them were on fire, very near to our house. That was the start of the war.

Were you at home with your children when the Russian army attacked?

Anatolii: Yes, we were working from home, so we were there with the kids. It was impressive to see the helicopters being shot down. Then Ukrainian helicopters came and started to fly above our forest to protect Hostomel, the city and airport northwest of Kyiv. All this was very loud. We saw enemy combat Mi-24 and K-52 helicopters.

So you knew the difference already?

Anatolii: Yes, we did know the difference from the experience of the past eight years. Their helicopters are much louder as well. On the first day, it was only combat helicopters. But the next day the artillery fire landed 200 or 300 metres away from our house. I think it was a howitzer: I don’t know for sure. Some people were curious – and it ended badly for them.

Tetiana: Yes, so we didn’t go to check. The electricity and heat were turned off the same day. There was no water as well. It was freezing cold.

When did you realize that the situation had escalated? When did you consider leaving?

Anatolii: Tetiana didn’t want to leave at all.

Tetiana: I hoped that even if Russian troops attacked, they would follow the Hostomel highway. But then the Ukrainian army blew up the main bridge through Irpin, so that the Russians couldn’t attack over it. They tried five times to blow up a small bridge through Moschun, a village near Kyiv, but it wasn’t destroyed, so the Russians were able to use that. They devastated Moschun and started work on our village. The streets in the village centre were all burning.   

So the area where you lived was under attack from the very beginning?

Tetiana: They started artillery shelling gradually from the first week. Three houses at first, then more…. On 3 March, I think, our industrial zone was already burning. All the horizon was red with flames.

Had you anticipated the war and made any preparations beforehand?

Anatolii: During the first few days, we organized a local self-defense group. Even the children of our community helped to build the checkpoint. Our three boys helped to bring tyres from our yard to build it. There were about 15 self-organized adult men. We built Czech hedgehogs (a static anti-tank defence made of metal angle beams) and set up a rota for everyone to be on duty. But we only had one hunting gun and one pneumatic weapon between us.

Tetiana: So we had no weapons to protect ourselves. Our community was completely unprepared for the war. Nothing was ready, absolutely nothing. We had no evacuation plan.

How and when did you decide to evacuate?

Anatolii: It took us a while to wrap our minds around the fact that we needed to evacuate.

Tetiana: There was shelling for the first eight days but not all the time. But when we heard shelling – buh-buh-buh-buh – the whole time, we understood that… (Tetiana’s voice breaks).

Anatolii: I went to the hospital to offer help, because the central military hospital was already full and unable to keep up with the influx of injured people. And the Leleka private maternity hospital was treating the injured. Eight guys were injured and two killed in the first fight. I saw this all happening in front of my own eyes and helped as I could.

Tetiana: Even then we hoped that the Ukrainians would push them away from the Kyiv region. I had a feeling that as long as I stayed nothing would happen to our home. But then, after a week, I understood that this was not a good idea. I knew that we needed to save our kids first and forget about the house.

What happened next? Did you leave by car?

Anatolii: Only Tetiana with the kids at first, not me. I stayed with our rabbits. (Tetiana and Anatolii laugh.) I was on duty at our local checkpoint. I’ve seen them using Pion howitzers.  It was unforgettable – it looked like a small nuclear explosion. There were no dead bodies afterwards because temperatures were so high. Everything was burned to ashes.

Tetiana: I spent one night with the kids in our small apartment in Kyiv and we left at 7 am the next morning. I didn’t have any plan except to drive West.  I had no specific destination in my head: wherever I drove to would be OK. I had never driven for more than an hour in my entire life. I don’t know where I got the energy to drive from 7 am until it got too dark to drive. By then we were in Vinnytsia.

Did you go on volunteering, Anatolii, after your family left?

Anatolii: There were still many people who had decided to stay in Horenka. Even when a lot of houses had been burnt to ashes, people thought that the Russians were just clearing their way along the Warsaw highway, through which they planned to attack.

During these times I was evacuating neighbours who had stayed in our village. The problem wasn’t evacuating, the problem was where to? I evacuated one family to our apartment in Kyiv, where they are still living. I hope they will be safe there. I evacuated another couple of families to their families. But then the Russians started to target all moving objects and it wasn’t safe to continue. I’ve seen a lot of wrecked cars in villages and there is also a lot of photo proof from Horenka. Looking back, I was just incredibly lucky.  

Do you know if your house still exists now?

Anatolii: It has no windows, but it’s still there. We are very lucky because the bomb destroyed a part of our neighbour’s house. The school of our kids has been burnt down.

What country in the EU did you plan to go to initially?

Anatolii: There was no plan here either. Tetiana was moving in the direction of Romania. Before we reunited, I didn’t sleep for 36 hours straight. 

How were the kids through all of this? Were you able to explain what had happened? How did you keep them occupied?

Tetiana: Maybe we will see consequences in the future. We didn’t explain anything at all to them.  

Anatolii: While we were still at home, there were two main tasks – chopping firewood to heat the house and cooking meals. I was at the checkpoint most of the time, there was constant artillery shelling. We could not hide in the basement because our house is situated in a swampy area. The children occupied themselves. Most of the time, they were just trying to get warm. The oldest helped with chopping firewood. When we got to the EU, we were on the move the whole time. They slept most of the time in the car since they were so exhausted. They didn’t even ask where we were going.

Tetiana: They probably just knew that in Ukraine there were bombs and shooting and here not. That was enough for them. They didn’t show signs of great anxiety or stress and that was a help. I don’t know how we would have got anywhere at all if they had been crying. We got lost many times on our way to Switzerland. But compared to what we went through in Ukraine it was nothing.

Anatolii: We were very lucky.

Did you manage to get your kids into a local school near Caux?

Anatolii: Yes, the school here is fantastic. They organized a special class with five boys, a teacher and a translator.   

Tetiana: The boys love badminton and there is a wonderful centre in Lausanne.  

How was your welcome in Caux?

Tetiana: We’re very happy that we were welcomed so kindly here in Caux. We had very limited resources and no idea what we would do. After these eight days in Ukraine without light and electricity, with nothing, it’s an absolute paradise here.

Anatolii: We did not expect such a welcome at all. We want to thank everyone from IofC Switzerland for all for the organizational work they did when we arrived and for helping us get our kids into school. They really gave our kids a chance!

About the author

Anastasia Slyvinska is a journalist from Kyiv, Ukraine. She has worked as a TV host, a foreign reporter and a manager for media outlets in Ukraine and abroad. Having worked at both Ukrainian and Canadian Parliaments she combines her media expertise with her political sciences background, holding a MA in Political Science. Anastasia has been part of the IofC community since 2014 when she first participated at the conference Just Governance for Human Security. She is currently living in Lausanne, Switzerland.

 

YOU CAN HELP!

 

As our own sources of funding are running out, we need your help to support the Caux Refuge project financially. We need CHF 20,000 to ensure that the group can be hosted until the end of 2022. We will use these funds to finance food aid and other costs related to the group's stay at the Villa Maria in Caux.

We thank you for your support. Please pledge your support here and specify “Caux Refuge” when making your contribution. If you have any proposals and questions, please get in touch with us.

 

 

Please note that the opinions expressed in these articles are those of the interviewees and not do not necessarily reflect the opinion of the interviewer and Initiatives of Change Switzerland.